There is much that can go wrong in this world and somehow, one finds a way to cope. There are everyday tragedies you learn to live with, like your neighbor on the Cape renting their cottage to absolutely hideous people. Or Ralph Lauren making their logo bigger than ever. (For those who are not regular readers, The Princess has been diagnosed as a Logophobic.) Or the caterer running out of the petit-fours you ordered for the League luncheon. Rain the day of your best friend Bitsy’s wedding at her home on the island. (Yes, the one she got in the divorce.) When these little tragedies occur, one simply soldiers on, no complaining, no whining, no PDGs. (Public Displays of Grief.)
But then you see this.
The recently released Tiffany eyeglasses and sunglasses with a logo the size of Mt. Rushmore. Trust us, it is that enormous. Hopefully the next photos give you some sense of the scale.
It’s not the fact that Tiffany is making glasses, or to be more accurate, allowing someone else to make the glasses and put their name on them. It’s called licensing and everyone does it. In this case it’s Luxottica that Tiffany made the arrangement with; the partnership was announced with great fanfare last fall and The Princess has been almost sleepless since, living in fear of how the final product would appear. As regular readers will know, a licensing deal is not what’s causing TP’s blood pressure to go off the charts. No, you know better and are quickly emailing each other with the Red Alert Signal, internally shrieking “Dive, Dive, Dive.” You know the staff has already fled the premises in terror, including Cook, always the most loyal of employees. They even removed the pets.
Well, you can all remain calm. We’re upgrading from the Prozac Latte to a double Lithium Light. On the rocks. Are we hurting? Of course. You see, if there was one company we thought would not fall prey to the logoization of everything, it was this one. We really should have known better. Truly we should have, because all the warning signs were there. The growing number of products in the catalog in the Return to Tiffany and 1837 Collections should have tipped us off. (Below we show a Return to Tiffany charm bracelet and an 1837 Collection cufflink.) Do we feel a sense of betrayal? Of course.
The majority of the glasses don’t appear to be completely wretched. It is the group styled after the Return to Tiffany collection with their massive sterling silver plates glued on the sides that are the worst offenders. LC (Lewis Comfort Tiffany, son of Tiffany founder Charles Lewis Tiffany) would absolutely stroke out if he saw these. Call TP crazy, but we sincerely doubt the Tiffany logo was, or is prominently displayed anywhere on the Vince Lombardi Trophy, commissioned by the NFL, and we doubt it is highly visible on the NASCAR trophy Tiffany’s was asked to create. But here we are with it on the glasses.
But you know what? TP will power down that Lithium Light and move on. Perhaps we’ll turn our attention to the must-see Whim Collection by Cynthia Rowley for Target. Now if you do find yourself intrigued by the eyewear, some of which is curious and some of which might be quite elegant, prices range from $330 to $1,150 and you’ll see everything from rimless to aviator styles. Happy Hunting.