“This is NOT Jersey Shore. It’s classier, smarter”

Hello and welcome to a Wednesday here at the Prepatorium, where we share an item we think will provide a modicum of entertainment.

Apparently a reality TV show based in the Hamptons is in the works, this story in Curbed notes that “nothing says classy like a Hamptons-based reality show”:

Now, we didn’t think it possible to assemble a more detestable group than that of The Jersey Shore, but it looks like that’s the goal here. Read it and weep (for humanity):

A prestigious NYC production company is planning to shoot a reality TV show about The Hamptons this summer. We are partnering with a major television network to bring the fun, drama, and ups and down of summer in the Hamptons to a national audience. We are assembling a diverse group of people who are from the area or who will be spending the summer in The Hamptons.

The Curbed story is illustrated with a great graphic.

Curbed.com

East Hampton Patch notes in its story:

The shoot is planned from July 1 to Aug. 31. East Hampton Town Clerk Fred Overton said no one has applied for a film permit yet, but they have until seven days before the first day of shooting to do so. If the shoot is taking place exclusively on private property, a permit will not be required.

Back to the actual ad:

Do you like to have fun, enjoy the limelight, have goals…. like starting a business or engaging in a new job, winning a surf competition… like to party, know the scene, are new to the scene, have boyfriend/ girlfriend problems, work hard to be able to afford a great lifestyle, don’t work at all because Daddy pays for everything, or just simply has a lot of charisma and want a shot at being on TV? Then be in touch!

This is NOT Jersey Shore. It’s classier, smarter. It’s The Hamptons, after all. Age range 21 – 30.

Thank heaven it’s NOT.

Of course, this isn’t the first time efforts were made to launch a reality show in this locale, here is a snippet from a reality ad of two years ago:

“If you are  21 to 35 years old and considered by others to be a TRUE “socialite” then our casting team wants to hear from you ASAP.  You must come from prominent family and have ties to the Hamptons.  Especially interested in those with a privileged lifestyle and a boarding school background.  Are you the first one to be invited to all the best parties and charity events?”

There’s nothing like looking at reality tv casting calls to restore your faith in America, here is an ad trying to cast a new show called “The Staff,” they’re looking for pool men, housekeepers, nannies, gardeners, estate managers with these qualifications:

  • Do you have loads of personality and love to gossip?
  • Do you think some of the people you work for are ridiculous in how they treat their family or run their house?
  • Are you good at what you do and not afraid to talk back to your boss?

Naturally all of the employees participating in this show will be able to keep their jobs, regardless of what they say about their employers. Really.

To be honest, I hadn’t heard of a show following this particular plotline before:

Big Frame Productions is doing an open call looking for strippers ages 18 – 28 for make-over show. Looking to upgrade their life.

It’s good to see casting calls for topics that are woefully undercovered, this show is seeking:

“…couples trying to save their relationship. Couples should be outgoing, no holds bar type personalities who are willing to open up about their relationship troubles on camera.”

Here’s the part from that couples ad that should answer any questions anyone has about the ‘reality’ of reality tv:

If you and your significant other have acting experience, that is a plus. Your relationship doesn’t have to be in major trouble. You just have to have the ability to play up the issues you do have.

Nothing says reality like professional actors.

You find so many unexplored topics on these reality casting sites, why has no one focused on this theme before?

Will you or anyone you know stop at nothing to meet pro athletes, and date them? Is it a weekly thing to go bars and events to meet athletes?

If that doesn’t ring your bells, the one for “Grossest Person in America” is arguably the most revolting thing we’ve read this week.

  • Do they cough or sneeze and not cover themselves?
  • Do they refuse to do laundry, clean the bathroom, or clean up after themselves?
  • Are they Rude? Crude? Or just plain Gross?

Here’s my personal favorite, I’m guessing you will like it too: “CASTING: MIDWESTERN GIRLS FOR NEW REALITY TV SHOW”:

  • Are you an outdoorsy chick who is also a major girly girl?
  • Do you wear stilettos and drive an ATV?
  • Do you and your friends hunt all day and party all night?

A major television production company is looking for a group of friends to follow in a brand new TV show. If you throw epic parties, always have boy drama and know your way around the woods then we want to hear from you! We are looking for those girls that everyone knows and everyone wants to be. Let’s show the world how real Midwesterners party!

What do you think, should I apply? (I know you all harbor an image of your trusty scribe careening around in an ATV, hunting all day and then partying all night. Admit it, that’s what you think.) Heh, heh, heh.

We leave you with a little something to make you smile, a few of the images that have popped up showcasing The Leg.

Via The Daily Mail

Until next time, may your reality be fabulous.

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8 Comments

Filed under preppy, The AntiPrep

8 responses to ““This is NOT Jersey Shore. It’s classier, smarter”

  1. BroncoMom

    The Preppy Princess in the Hampton’s. Please oh please apply!!

  2. MCW

    LOL! Love it. All I have to say is 21 to 30 years olds usually can’t afford the real “Hamptons” (my self included! I only get to go cause of my sister! Ha.) At least the “Hamptons” we all think about. Can’t wait to see what they come up with!!!

  3. Too funny…..oh and I do love how the Queen is doing “the leg”……hysterical, do you think all this poking fun is phasing Angelina or is she just laughing it off and sticking out that leg a little further!
    These reality shows are taking over the world…its like world domination, I know so many people who are addicted to them…its nuts!! The Hamptons has all the makings of a very entertaining show to say the least, this is one I will stay tuned to watch, but you know how some people say anyone worth knowing is NOT joining the casts of these reaity shows and I can’t help but think there must be some truth…I mean who wants to put themselves under a microscope like that!

  4. Presumably, ex-Governor Palin would be a shoo-in [as it were] for that last role. Quite a post, and glad you are able to cover this topic; perhaps an addendum to Edward Gibbon’s work is in order.

  5. Vicky

    Why do I get the sense that Angelina’s crazy leg is part of some inside joke we’ll never understand? Maybe its going to the Hamptons this summer.

  6. Jen

    I thought they already made that show. It’s called Revenge and it was just on last night.

  7. Lauren

    I may be dating myself here, but I remember a two-part documentary on ABC about “life” in the Hamptons over the course of a summer from the perspective of celebrities, weekenders, working people and the townsfolk. It was the summer that Lizzie Grubman backed into a crowd of people with her car as she was leaving a club and just drove away.

    Ah reality tv before it was trendy!

  8. Oh geeze! No reality show is ever classy. It’s totally going to be the Jersey Shore gone Hamptons. Real estate in that area fascinates me though so I will be curious to see where they take the show.

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